Saturday, August 28, 2010

Why Just Nap When You Can “Snazzy Nap!”

A friend of my husband sent this to me the other day…

I could comment on the fashion statement this makes.

But I won’t.

I could comment on the designs – my favorite being the little lamb -
But I won’t do that either.
I could also comment on how when this is in use it looks eerily like a corpse draped with the Medical Examiner’s cloth and also discuss how that would totally creep me out if I saw it on an airplane or in a public place.
But I certainly wouldn’t do that.
What I will ask – since the whole purpose of this is privacy while sleeping in public places, does it come with Ear plugs???
Thanks Matt M…I too wonder why we didn’t think of that first – oh yea, because we are normal sane people – for the most part anyway.
found at yes – there’s a whole website.
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Thursday, August 26, 2010

Got Wi-Fi?

I know, I know – everyone can always use a good wi-fi signal.

I mean you know you’ve done it – sitting outside a Starbucks or a McDonalds with your laptop trying to send an email or check your favorite blog…some of you might be doing it right now…

Anyway – wouldn’t it be nice if someone came up with a way to detect wi-fi signals without having to drive down the street with your laptop open and waiting for a connection?  (of course not while STARING at your laptop.  You’d never want to drive and use your computer at the same time…at least not without one of these: – safety first people!!!)  Wouldn’t it be great if you could simply look down at your chest and determine if you had wi-fi access?


Ah, much better.

Of course the guys at have saved the day once again.  Now you can announce to the world that you are a signal surfer.  I suggest you wear it and walk up and down your street – who knows what neighbor you can mooch of of next…

Not that I condone the use of your neighbor’s wireless connection.

Unless it’s an emergency

Like you need to read my blog.

Then it’s okay.

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Wednesday, August 25, 2010


Today I’m not feeling well.  Honestly – not sure why.  My husband will tell you it is because I do too much and don’t rest enough.  I will tell you it’s because I have five children and three of them recently started school – along with a whole bunch of other children…a friend of mine will tell you that schools are just germ factories, which is why so many of them produce doctors.

Anyway.  Because my throat hurts I was looking for something to soothe it.

There are a lot of beverages out there to cure your medical conditions such as:


I’m pretty sure that one is for urinary tract infections.

And this one:


For those inflicted with hypohidrosis (people that can’t sweat on their own, or don’t produce enough of it…)

I’ve also located this seemingly helpful beverage…I think it is a substitute for Bean-o.


The following I’m a little confused on…not sure if it gives you SARS or is supposed to be an antidote for it:


The next one is genius.  I mean pure genius.  Whoever thought of selling water to those with aquaphobia (fear of water…not to be confused with hydrophobia which is an aversion to swallowing liquids and is commonly associated with rabies in humans) …well they were just pure – genius.


Waterproof water…amazing.

Sadly I never did find anything to cure my sore throat.  I guess I just stick to the old standby of hot water with honey and lemon.  However, I do feel comforted to know that beverage makers of the world are out to cure common ills, don’t you?

I feel I have to add a disclaimer, because you know there are one or two folks out there that will read this and then make a run to their nearest grocer or druggist to buy a case of fart juice for their loving spouse.  Of course none of these beverages do the things I say they do, they are just very oddly named…I think.  I’ve never purchased one so I guess I could be wrong…maybe they are amazing cures for whatever ails you…maybe not.

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Monday, August 23, 2010

Duct Tape – bandaids

Okay, for a minute here we just have to acknowledge just how very cool duct tape really is.

Let us bask in it’s awesomeness. 

Every single repair known to man can be achieved with a little bit of duct tape.

So, why not fix manly boo-boos with it too?  (yes I realize using the words “manly” and “boo boos” in the same sentence is a bit oxy-moron-ish…but that all depends on the man.)

Introducing Nexcare Duct Tape Bandaids – for all your manly boo boo needs.


Just don’t try to repair your car fender with them.  I’m pretty sure they won’t hold.  Just guessin’

(sadly – these are not available anymore…but I couldn’t resist including them anyway.  As a consolation prize please enjoy this picture of some duct tape roses we made for a friend of ours who is a definite mans man…he decided to jump off (and by jump off I mean he was working on the roof on a ladder which wasn't rated for a man of his stature and fell) off of a roof and broke his leg.)


Again I repeat – let us all bask in the awesomeness that is duct tape…
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Sunday, August 22, 2010

Bacon Baby

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.

Everybody. Loves. Bacon.

or at least everyone should.

I’m not entirely certain (however) that this is entirely an appropriate way to introduce small children to the salty and meaty treat.


Then again, who am I to deny my children the bacon-y goodness?

(my kids are all so lucky they are off the bottle – or I would totally buy this just to see how they’d like it…I do have a great-nephew due in December though…I wonder if my niece will let me baby sit…)

(found at J&D’s – the home for all your bacon needs.)

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Saturday, August 21, 2010


If you follow our Facebook page ( then you might have already gotten a taste of today’s find.

As a mother to five very opinionated kids (especially when it comes to how their PB&J is packaged and served – heaven forbid the sandwich should be squished when it comes out of the lunchbox…)  this product leaves me a little well…confused as to what I should be thinking about it.


You see, it’s a Canned Sandwich…a candwich…a sandwich in a can.

PB&J I think I might be able to understand and possibly even stomach to try it…


…it also comes in Barbeque Chicken and Pepperoni Pizza Pocket – which sounds….um…delightful?

I promise one thing, if this actually does make it to market (promised Fall of 2010) I will buy one and photograph the trial of it.  I might, however, make someone else be the stunt mouth for this one.

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Thursday, August 19, 2010

Will Somebody Please Call PETA?

These just can’t possibly be humane.

image image image image

Look.  My Dog Summer actually has a few dresses.  She even has little booties to protect her feet from the blistering hot sidewalk (which, yes – you can fry an egg on in Arizona so why wouldn’t I put shoes on my poor puppy???)

But a wig?


Maybe on a Hairless dog.


Not even then.


Found at – where there are even more pictures of dogs that seem to scream…please, for the love of all that is decent and holy – save me now.

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Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Demeter Lobster Cologne

Who doesn’t like the scent of fresh steamed lobster and melted butter?

You can’t see it, but I’ve got the Homer Simpson drool thing going on right now…

So why not make it into a cologne for men?



I think a cautionary tale is important here.

Product is not actual lobster, nor does it turn your spouse into one.  Product may cause sudden urge to dip husband’s arms in melted butter.  Resist this urge.  Melted butter is, after all  - very expensive.

(found at

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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

HAND Soap…

I’ve seen flower shaped soap.  Shell shaped soap.  Even soap shaped like tiny pieces of citrus fruit – heck, I’ve MADE soap like that.

But now – introducing…soap for those who have to be literal about all their products:


That’s right folks…Hand soap.  For all your hand washing needs.

Look at the bright side, at least one of them is telling you they love you…


Before it reaches out and grabs you that is.


I think this goes way beyond a simple bath scrubbing…you might want to call an exorcist instead of attempting to clean this one yourself…

(found at I’m pretty sure they are just creative, not creepy – or at least that was the intent anyway.)

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Thursday, August 12, 2010

Puppy Ramps

I’ve fallen victim to many infomercials over the years.

Magic Bullet – Yea, I’ve got one.

Sham Wow – yep, got one of those too.

Mighty Putty…we’ll call that one a memorial purchase in honor of the late Billy Mays.

One thing I’ve found infomercials do really, really well is convincing poor sleep deprived members of society that they simply cannot live another moment without _________ (fill in the blank here).

My latest infomercial almost buy?

(I say almost here, because I did come to my senses…before I picked up the phone, thankyou.)


In case you don’t know, I recently adopted a puppy…well she’s five years old, but she’s puppy sized.  She really likes to sit on the bed, on the couch, etc…but she’s tiny, so getting up onto them is sometimes difficult for her.

So, there is this designer line of puppy ramps so that your small dog doesn’t have to feel left out and CAN get up on the furniture…


They come in “standard” and “designer” both products are represented here.  I think the difference is in color…and price.

So how much will one of these little ramps set you back?

$225.00 for the second one shown.

*ack* *cough* *choke* *other inaudible sounds and words…*

On second thought, she doesn’t need to sleep on my couch that bad.

found at

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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Now With Magical Marshmallows…

I was at the store the other day.  We’ll call the store “Schmall-mart” (only because I need to protect the retailer from certain embarrassment simply because they carry this product….)  Anyway I was in the freezer section looking for something healthy and good for you (what…it could happen…) and I found these:


Cereal Conez…now with Magical Marshmallows.

Think Drumsticks – only….not.

Remember how your favorite part of the Lucky Charms used to be the Marshmallows?  That is before you grew up and got all health conscious…okay well some of you did. 

These cones attempt to mix our two favorite things from childhood – ice cream cones and Magical Marshmallows.

I. Had. To. Try. Them.


Yes, that’s me.  Don’t laugh.

I invited my friend Ginger over and we proceeded to experiment…well I did.  She took the pictures…lucky, lucky girl.

The reveal….
The discovery…


The texture test…ooooooo….Spongy….(which by the way, I’m not even certain is a word, but Ginger and I say it is…so there.)


The first attempted bite…It was a false start…I smelled the marshmallow goodness and had to regroup…besides, the marshmallows were not like the ones I remembered from my bowl of Lucky Charms last night when I was little…they were soft and squishy and … well…not at all what I was expecting.


Okay…here we go…ready, set…


EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!  But look at all the pretty colors…


Sad to say, it wasn’t exactly the magical moment I was promised…however the kids liked them…which is good, because I would hate to say that I just took a three dollar bite of marshmallow magic.


They certainly look happy…

P1090370 P1090369  P1090368

Caution: not to be eaten without supervision…there is chocolaty goodness that coats the inside of the spongified (again, it is a word because WE say so…) cone after all…


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Monday, August 9, 2010

Bridal Diapers

When I got married my dress was big.  It was frilly.  It was ELABORATE…and it took about 20 minutes to get out of (mostly because of all the teeeny tiny buttons that ran down the back of it. 

Our wedding ceremony was at 10 o’clock in the morning and our reception at 6 that night with various other family festivities in between.  There was a brief stop off at my mother in law’s house where I was able to ditch the dress to take care of some…personal matters…but I also had an army of attendants there to help me in and out of the big puffy thing.

I have to admit though, even with all the time I’d be spending in that dress that day – I never, ever would have done this:


Think training pants for adults.

Can you imagine your first dance with your sweet new husband and he suddenly says….”do you smell something?  I distinctly smell urine…”

or the awkward moment back at the honeymoon suite…

“just a moment dear while I slip out of my diaper…”  Yes, because that will surely keep the flames burning…

What’s next?  Nuptual Noseplugs?

Thank you Tiffany S-W. for sending these to me…you were right, they were something I could write about!  Who ever thought diapers could be so interesting?

found at

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Thursday, August 5, 2010

Anything For White Teeth…

Many people will do anything for vanity.

I mean it’s very important to always look your best.

However, I think it’s very funny to see what people will go through to achieve beauty.

Remember the pore strips?  Millions of women across America looking like professional football players with nose injuries just to get rid of a few black heads.

In fact, my sister and I bought these strips and decided to try them together.  We made sure all the windows were closed and made sure nobody was coming over…then we wet them down and stuck them on the nose.

Two things -

1) when you are absolutely certain you aren’t expecting visitors is exactly when someone will show up unexpectedly.


2) when you pull those strips off quickly and with full force because someone has shown up at the door they not only hurt like heck but they will also rip in half causing you to pull the second half off while trying to see straight through the tears that have formed in your eyes.

That all being said – if you buy this thing (it’s supposed to make your teeth white, it’s called the Forever White) make sure you just block off contact from all people all together…


Smile and say cheese….

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Wednesday, August 4, 2010


Because you know, you always needed a travel case for your single serve cupcake.


Just don’t tip it upside down. (So I’m thinking lunchbox use is a no?)

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Monday, August 2, 2010

Late Night TV Gets Me Again…

First let me say – I love this commercial.  I actually love all the Jack commercials.  He makes me laugh.  His face with simple expressions (yes I know they are drawn on…what’s yer pernt?) anyway, it’s just funny.

“Yea, I just don’t think I’m comfortable with people eating my face…”

So, um…do you think the same thing applies here?image

I don’t know about you, but I’m thinking if I sit down to a big plate of pancakes or a perfectly grilled grilled cheese sandwich and I see HIS face staring back at me, I might seriously question cutting into it.  To me it would just feel…wrong somehow. 

Just sayin’.

found at

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Sunday, August 1, 2010

Travel Wise…Grashopper…

Ever travel abroad and have trouble communicating with the locals?

Ever find yourself standing on a street corner doing the potty dance in hopes that someone will recognize and understand the signals and point you in the right direction?

Then you need one of these:


Simply point to the question mark square in the center of your chest and then to the international sign for the service you seek…just don’t get the symbols confused because I’d really hate to see you ask where the bathroom is and end up at the airport – although most likely they’d have bathrooms at the airport so that might work…

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