Pooping...you're doing it wrong.

And here, I thought the biggest advance in the flush toilet was the elongated seat.

Instant Arm Lift

Sagging jiggly arms?

Embarrassed to wear the season's hottest short sleeved fashions?

No problem! Instant arm lift to the rescue!

Or, you could just wrap your arms in Beiber Duck Tape.  It'd only be slightly more noticeable, and will probably remove unsightly arm hair at the same time! It's a two for one Win-Win.

Justin Bieber...Nail Polish

Okay, so I know all about the Biebster...I have two tweenage girls after all.  I also understand that celebrities tend to brand every day items as "their own" to capitalize on their fame and to gain more fortune...  examples of this:

Madden NFL games (You see, he's a football star, and he branded a football game.  Makes perfect sense.)

Wolfgang Puck Cookware.  (An amazing chef who has branded his own line of cookware...)

Michael Jordan Cologne. (Because we all want to smell like a sweaty athlete...)

And now, introducing the most recently celebrity branded product, sure to make perfect sense in the minds of millions of Americans...

Justin Bieber Nail polish.

Because he's pretty and looks like a girl?

We'll go with that.

Swallowable Parfume

I've been on hiatus for a while -- and I've been telling myself it was going to take something truly special to get me back in the swing of things...

This. Is. Definitely. Special.

Little pills that make you emanate odors that are uniquely your own.

Other things that you can ingest that will help you emanate odors uniquely your own?

Beans. Broccoli. Garlic. Mouthwash.

The basics.

Hello friends, it's good to be back.

Commercials that Shouldn't - HP Printer Baby

I don't even know if I found this one cute at first - of course the hundreds of hours of play time it got in it's first week could be the reason for that.  But that's not why I posted it here today...Did you know this video caused an outpouring of support for child actors and child labor laws?  Seems there were a whole bunch of people upset that the baby was being dragged through the desert in a walker against their will.

Somebody - SAVE THE CHILDREN!
(before they grow up to be weird people that don't understand green screen technology and would believe that a production company would actually drag a baby though miles and miles of road and dirt just for a commercial...)

Don't believe me?  Read the comments on the youtube site where this was posted.  An exec from HP actually had to post this statement:

Some facts are needed. I was involved with the production. The commercial was done on green screen. There are very strict rules for child actors to protect their safety, comfort and protect their financial interest. All in compliance.Rules are very strict about how long the child can actually be on camera which is why triplets were used and not one child. This is to ensure the kids were given breaks and their well being came first. Enough with the? abuse. Children were safe. Period.

Sheesh. 

No actual children were harmed in the writing of this post.  While I do not use green screen technology in my work, I do always keep the health and welfare of the children first. My children are always safe and protected and free from harm. Why? Because I use one of these... http://www.someonewillbuythis.com/2010/02/baby-keeper.html

Thank you.

Commercials that Shouldn't - Vintage Ads

There are a ton of ads that run daily that deserve a mention - but - - - bad ads started somewhere.  Let's take a look at some of the ads that plagued us as children - the ones that will stay with us forever, no matter how hard we try to forget.

Head On ... a company that is so successful they could only produce a 10 second commercial and then played it in a loop in order to fill the 30 second spot..."apply directly to the forehead" ... that is after you bang it into the wall repeatedly after seeing this commercial ninety times while watching daytime television (which also may be causing you to bang your head against the wall - depending on the channel.)

Who can forget this one?  Seriously - who can???  I think it's still playing. I wonder if this ad would hold up as evidence if I actually did return my tire that way...they did ask me to, right?

Of course if I didn't put this one in a post about annoying vintage commercials - I'd probably lose my blogger license.  Really, they'd create one and then take it away because I didn't include the "Where's the Beef" lady.  On a side note - whenever I eat at any fast food restaurant I still wonder if that question has been answered...

Last but not least...this little bit of awesomeness.  I'm confused isn't Hawaiian Punch a kids drink???  What are they selling here anyway?

Oh and bonus points for the commenter that names the celebrity endorsements...

Please don't forget to join us on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/someonewillbuyit . . . hilarity and fun ensues there...I promise.  Plus, the occasional free give away.  But don't just come for the free stuff, come for the fun too.  It's like marrying rich - and cute.

Commercials That Shouldn't - Axe Body Spray

I admit it, the first time I saw an Axe commercial I thought it was clever.

Okay - that could have been while I was ill or sleep deprived or both.

(definitely both)

These new ones though - Bom Chicka Wah wah...

Definitely a Channel changer...

Commercials that Shouldn't - Ranjit and Chad...

Pretty much anything by Metro PCS' team of Ranjit and Chad qualifies as one of the most annoying tv spots in the universe.  But here are a few of the "Favorites" submitted by some of our readers who apparently live in a TV market that play these often.

On a side note - Today I'd like to express just how grateful I am for my DVR.  So very, very grateful.

Forever Lazy

I have to give the product name credit.  It does make me wonder what in the world it is - and secretly makes me want it, if it works that is.

What woman out there wouldn't like the opportunity to be "forever lazy?"

What woman wouldn't enjoy a day actually sitting around watching Grey's Anatomy (or insert your favorite non-animated show here)and eating bon bons at least one day in her life?

The name Forever Lazy conjures up robotic maids and in house chefs and grocery delivery, and pool boys named Gorgeous...or Bob.  Whatever - as long as they wear the uniform (you know what I mean...)

Forever Lazy certainly doesn't conjure up this:

It's not a Snuggie - it's a fitted blanket - with sleeves and legs and - yes - a trap door you can use when you need to answer the call of nature.

Can you say sexxxxxy?

Now can you say it with a straight face while referring to this thing?????

Best of the Worst Commercials.

There were a few nominations on our facebook page - but then this was brought up (sorry, bad choice of words).

It's the OMGIGP (Oh my Gosh I'm Gonna Puke) video for IE8...

Classy Microsoft.  Really Classy.

Comment below on this - or to suggest your favorite best of the worst.  Although, not really sure how you can get much worse than this...Flo from Progressive is a close second tho...

Commercials - The best of the worst.

By request of my sister - the amazing Janene - we are starting a new feature-The best of the worst commercials.

Weekly we'll post a commercial that makes you laugh, makes you cry, makes you reach for the remote control?every, single, time. We?ll post commercials that we've all seen - the ones that are like an accident on the freeway - you can't look away - even though you know you should. We'll post commercials that get a jingle in your head that you spend the rest of your day - sometimes your LIFE trying to get rid of.

So - starting this week - Commercials that Shouldn't...and we are kicking it all off with this wonderful little piece from Snuggie...

Now you can go on with your day.

by the way - should you find a commercial worthy of this honor - send it to me either via facebook (www.facebook.com/someonewillbuyit) or email - tj@yoktom.com

Happy Surfing!

The Slob Stopper

What comes to mind when you hear that?

A giant security guard/bouncer dude at the door of a fancy restaurant making sure you are wearing the appropriate attire?

An automatic comb/brush/hair styling combo guaranteed to keep you polished to perfection?

A house cleaning robot that takes husbands and children and locks them in a closet until they learn to pick up their stuff and put it away? (ahhhh-let's just enjoy that picture for a moment...)

If your imagination led you to any one of the three above scenarios - then - well, you need a new imagination. I'll show you a picture to give you a hint?

Does this help?

No huh?

Still no idea what the "SlobStopper" could possibly be?

I probably shouldn't keep you in suspense much longer?

This ginormous 20" x 40" vinyl tarp is a bib.

For adults.

Or children with a pituitary disorder. Whatever.

You see - you wear it in your car so that if you happen to get your favorite fast food for your long commute - it doesn't end up all over your shirt during the drive.

And according to this video it's handy - and Sexy. Because nothing says sexy like a grown adult wearing a bib who can't seem to keep their beverages in their cup?

Although, as a Mom, I'm totally buying one to wear when I take my kids and their friends out in public. I think I might also "forget" I have it on and wear it into the store/mall/sporting event. That. Would. Be. Awesome.

Sushi Poppers

Mmmmm…Fresh Sushi…in a frozen cardboard tube and eaten much like a push pop ice cream treat…

Fresh and delivered daily.

As fresh as frozen sushi can be anyway.

(I’m classifying this as an edible gift – but you must know, I have my reservations about that.)

Automatic Toilet Flusher.

I saw this amazing ad for a great product….as a mother of five (toilet flushing challenged individuals…) I was thinking HEY – This looks AWESOME!  Seriously – who wouldn’t want something that did the following:

• Automatic Toilet Flusher just like those in Public Restrooms
• Includes 4 Built-In Flushing Functions
• Flushing Function 1: Sensor Flush with Adjustable Distance Sensor flushes when you Walk away from the Toilet
• Flushing Function 2: Sensor Flush Plus Delay - Flushes Toilet with Sensor plus Additional 7 Second Delay
• Flushing Function 3: Touch-Free Hand-Wave Flush - Flushes your Toilet with the Wave of your Hand in Front of Sensor
• Flushing Function 4: Automatic 24 Hour Flush - Flushes Once a Day while you Travel
• Installs in Less then 10 Minutes
• Fits Virtually All Toilets in the U.S. & Canada
• Batteries Included that last for up to 100,000 Flushes!

Amiright?  Honestly – every mother’s dream come true, right?

Right?

Except when you realize the product is marketed for use by Cats.

That’s right – cats.

There’s not a rule that says I can’t buy it anyway and install it for my kittens right?  I’ll even make them use a fuzzy headband with pointed ears and tail if needed. 

Notice I didn’t even MENTION the fact that there are people out there toilet training their cats.  There were no “Meet the Parents” references.  I think I should also get credit for NOT posting this video from their website.  I also haven’t mentioned anything about the toilet training kit for Cats.  Not a word.  I’ve really grown in maturity don’t you think?

You Gonna Cover That Up?

Here in Arizona about two years ago, a mother was cited for breast feeding in public.

Granted, she was topless, and at a public swimming pool making absolutely no effort to cover up – at all – but you know, her personal choice, yada yada yada.  I personally nursed all 5 of my kids – but never in public like she did.  I’m much to quiet and reserved for that type of public display…shut up, I am too.

Anyway – I’m not going to get into whether I think it was wrong or right for her to be ticketed by police for indecent exposure.  I don’t even want to start the conversation (this is a humorous look at products after all, not a political forum – with the exception of the republican and democrat toilet paper, which we can all agree is funny regardless of which side of the proverbial fence you are on…)  I only bring it up because of this toy:

She seems innocent enough, right?

Um wait – Now I do believe I’ve seen it all in the world of kids toys. 

Two things -

1) Magnetic Pasties

and

2) Realistic sucking noises.

I’m just not sure where to file this one, educational toys?  Health and medical?  Strange and Creepy?  I’m just at a loss.

Why Just Nap When You Can “Snazzy Nap!”

A friend of my husband sent this to me the other day…

 

I could comment on the fashion statement this makes.

But I won’t.

I could comment on the designs – my favorite being the little lamb -

 

But I won’t do that either.

 

I could also comment on how when this is in use it looks eerily like a corpse draped with the Medical Examiner’s cloth and also discuss how that would totally creep me out if I saw it on an airplane or in a public place.

 

But I certainly wouldn’t do that.

 

What I will ask – since the whole purpose of this is privacy while sleeping in public places, does it come with Ear plugs???

 

Thanks Matt M…I too wonder why we didn’t think of that first – oh yea, because we are normal sane people – for the most part anyway.

found at http://www.snazzynapper.com yes – there’s a whole website.

Late Night TV Gets Me Again…

First let me say – I love this commercial.  I actually love all the Jack commercials.  He makes me laugh.  His face with simple expressions (yes I know they are drawn on…what’s yer pernt?) anyway, it’s just funny.

“Yea, I just don’t think I’m comfortable with people eating my face…”

So, um…do you think the same thing applies here?

I don’t know about you, but I’m thinking if I sit down to a big plate of pancakes or a perfectly grilled grilled cheese sandwich and I see HIS face staring back at me, I might seriously question cutting into it.  To me it would just feel…wrong somehow. 

Just sayin’.

found at http://www.jesuspan.com

Fabulous Finds Friday – Sleep.

You got it.  Sleep.

There is no actual fabulous find today – why?

This.week.has.been.insanely.crazy.

With the opening of the week including a major technological crash (my cell phone), meet the teacher, school shopping, pre-teen frustrations and puppy dog training (she hates people…another story all together…)I’ve just not had any opportunity to find something really rockin’ awesome to share.

So, the thing I reccomend this Fabulous Friday?

Cuddle up with the one you love, put on a great movie, and relax.

We’ll be back to normal (as normal as I can be anyway – really) tomorrow.

And, if you have any fabulous finds suggestions, send them my way. 

Have a great day!  I’m off to do more shopping…school starts Monday.  Oh and on that note…enjoy my most favorite commercial ever:

FacialFlex

So supposedly, you put this in your mouth and squeeze your cheeks and it makes you look years younger.

Um…Years younger isn’t exactly what I’m seeing.

Nope, not my first thought at all.

I can, however see men purchasing this in bulk for their wives.

Because you know if they  are doing this they can’t be talking…I hear that is annoying to some men.  My husband, on the other hand, loves the sound of my voice.

Right dear?

He says yes.

See.

Yet Another Company That Should ReThink Thier Name

And possibly their slogan.

Bimbo Bread company.

Bringing families together since 1945.

(I bet they are…)

Thank you Kim S for pointing this one out.