GoPet Exercise Wheels – it’s not what you think…

You know how you get a dog and at first walking it is fun and enjoyable – and then it just gets to be annoying?  I mean – these dogs just like to go outside all the time!  First they are bringing you their leash, and then they start to interrupt the “Price is Right” because they want to go outside and run and play…sheesh!  If only they made giant hamster wheel type contraptions for dogs…then you would never have to miss another over bid on the final showcase ever again…wouldn’t that be cool?

Hmmm….I stand corrected.  Not cool.  Not cool at all.  I mean, you still have to get up and put him IN that thing…

well okay, what if there was one that attached to their kennel or dog run in the back yard?  Then you’d NEVER have to pay any attention to your pet at all!  (except to feed it of course…)

Oh … well … um… hmmmm….Why does that look like a giant chicken coop with an exhaust fan to me?

Oh that’s right, because that’s EXACTLY what that looks like.

Well, maybe there’s a happy medium…a small treadmill built just for Fido…he can walk himself – just tether him to it with a leash…

Oh boy.  Um. Ok.

I think I’m going to go take my dog for a walk now…a real one, in the park with the trees and the grass and – um you know – fresh air.

And just in case you think this is photoshopped artwork – which you know I’d never – ever do…(heh heh heh) These are found at http://www.gopetusa.com/index.php.  Another bona fide legitimate pet product company…well a pet product company anyway.

Airbrush Body Tattoo Kit…

For those who want the Bad Boy persona…without all the pain…or permanence of it all.

Just don’t get it wet.

Because I’m pretty sure a running tattoo will surely lose you some major street cred.

(okay technically, the site does say they are waterproof – but that’s just not as funny.)

Do you have your turkey yet?

Ever find yourself the day before Thanksgiving without the main course?

Have you ever gone to the store to find one only to discover they are all FROZEN SOLID and there’s no way you’ll get it thawed, seasoned, cooked and on the table on time?

Do you own a rifle?

If you answered YES to any of the above – but mostly to the third one – you may be in luck. (uh, so to speak…)

Don’t worry about trying to fish all those pesky steel shot pellets out of your game.  Just pluck it clean and place it in the oven…the flavor pellets (ie: ammo) will melt in the oven to season the bird for you!   Shoots, Kills, Seasons.

Wow, a two-step turkey.  Ya know, with the first step being go out and hunt it down…

I think I’d rather take my chances with the frozen turkey – personally.  Just think of the mess to clean up the kitchen alone after an endeavor like this…and then you still have to make pies!

More Thanksgiving Day Finds…

Planning your perfect Thanksgiving dinner?  Do you have your turkey picked out and thawed out for cooking tomorrow?  You didn’t thaw out the turkey? 

That’s okay – you can always serve this instead…

*shudder*

That’s right folks – your very own turkey shaped Jell-O mold.

Oh, and don’t forget to wash it down with this:

The Jones Soda Company’s yearly treat – Tofurkey and Gravy Soda.  Mmmmm…

Make your friends and family say - “Can we at At McDonalds this year????”

The sure fire way to make sure you never have to host Thanksgiving again…ever.  Probably Christmas and Easter at your house will be cancelled too.

I like Star Trek as much as the next girl…

But…

I’ve never considered decking out my kitchen with these items:

The USS Enterprise pizza cutter…boldy go where your pepperoni has never gone before…

“Dammit Jim, I’m a Doctor, not a pizza delivery boy!”

Or how about these beautiful hanging lights:

“No Billy, the aliens aren’t really coming from the ceiling.   It’s the Enterprise…they are friendly.”

I also can’t say that I’d have one of these hanging in my kitchen either:

The family room, sure, but not the kitchen. 

“What time is dinner?”

“Half past the Klingon War Bird”

Teach ‘em young Trekkers – teach ‘em young.

(Pizza slicer found at www.thinkgeek.com, Starship hanging light at http://www.geekologie.com/2009/11/classy_a_starship_enterprise_c.php, and the clock – bask again in it’s awesomeness… http://www.techchee.com/2009/04/28/star-trek-clock/) 

The Most Wonderful Time of The Year…

I love this time of year.  People always find the most inventive ways to take ordinary items and turn them into splendid holiday gifts.

I love walking into stores and finding previously neglected items turned into amazing holiday gifts with the addition of a simple wrapping bow:

Nothing says Happy Holidays like Red Meat -  Amiright???

I seriously think I’ve underestimated the gift quality of meat.  Seriously.

Meat also makes a great decoration, in case you didn’t know…

Ahhhh…the pork and potatoes nativity … a must in every home.  This decoration is also accompanied by the time honored Christmas Carol “We Three Kings Became Puppy Chow” (Sung to the tune of “We Three Kings Of Orient Are” of course)

These bath gift baskets have always made me giggle.  I realize they are supposed to be a gift of relaxation and pampering treatments – however whenever I get one I can’t help but think…

“Merry Christmas Mom!  You STINK!!!”

(Pretty please use this before our company gets here…no really, hurry.  Maybe you should use it twice…)

This next gift is a beautifully wrapped piece…

Isn’t it gorgeous?  Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to get chocolate for Christmas.  The more the merrier – BUT, it still kinda says “I thought of you while standing in the grocery checkout line…” Dontcha think?

Oh – Wait, I get it---you are buying the chocolate bar for the same person you are buying THESE for:

(isn’t it awesome how they incorporated the BOW into the packaging?  No need to wrap!  Pure GENIUS I tell you!  GENIUS!)

Or finally – because buying her that blender last Christmas didn’t get you in enough trouble…

Oh look!  What I always wanted … A Bottle brush.  Gee.  Thanks.

 

 

Thank you Bill C. for pointing out to me that meat is not only thoughtful but also romantic.  Who knew…

Hizamakura Lap Pillow

Do you remember the Hug Me Pillow?  No?  You can see it Here.

Apparently the men felt left out of the whole “I need a special pillow to comfort me while you are away” thing.

So they decided to invent this:

What is it?  

Other than a creepy bottom half of a woman wearing a short skirt?

It’s a lap pillow of course.

Awww…doesn’t it just make you feel all warm and snuggly inside?

Yea, me either.

Again – found at Japan Trend Shop.  Where they are always coming up with new ways to comfort you. http://www.japantrendshop.com/hizamakura-lap-pillow-p-64.html

Japanese Flu Masks

Remember a few years back with the Avian flu hit and then the Swine flu?  Face masks were all the rage – you saw them everywhere. They were almost a fashion trend.  Almost.

Of course if they had started out with these…the trend might have stuck.

Yes, that really is a chimpanzee formed mask.

If I had one of those I don’t think I’d wait for the flu.  I’d wear it every day. Really.   EVERY DAY.

found at Japan Trend Shop … where they are always on the front lines of fashion.  http://www.japantrendshop.com/to-be-someone-fashion-face-masks-p-824.html

Give Thanks…

To the Porcelain Throne.

I mean heck – as long as you are decking out the house for the holidays, you better remember the most used seat in the house, am I right?

Of course I am.

Toilet Tattoos – The Thanksgiving design (which makes me think there are other designs out there too???) for Elongated or standard toilets. 

Fabulous.

There now, I’m back. And in the spirit of Thanksgiving,  I’m sure you’re giving thanks for that.  Did you miss me? :)

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!